I Promise it Won’t Always Hurt Like This

Clare Mackintosh

When bestselling writer Clare Mackintosh’s son died at five weeks old, she turned to books for help. At the time, none of them resonated with her, nor fully reflected what she was feeling. Clare has written this honest and insightful book, ‘I Promise it Won’t Always Hurt Like This: 18 Assurances on Grief’, based on her experiences of losing her son and her father.

Her 18 assurances address some of the thoughts and feelings that have overwhelmed her since the death of her son, written from the perspective of someone who, with the benefit of time, can reflect on where she was then and where she is now, more than 18 years on.

It is a beautiful, heartfelt book full of wisdom and advice for both the bereaved and those supporting them.

WHAT WHITEBALLOON THINKS

Above all else, this is a book about hope, particularly for those still in the deep depths of grief. The 18 assurances allow chinks of light to shine through, even when everything may seem endlessly dark. The way the book is structured, with chapters covering each of Clare’s 18 assurances, makes it easy to dip in and out of or to skip to a section that resonates or seems relevant to you at that time – assurances like ‘I promise this won’t always be your first thought in the morning‘, ‘I promise you won’t always be winded by someone else’s happiness‘ and ‘I promise that you won’t always be broken by anniversaries‘.

As Clare says in her introduction ‘I write to make sense of the world, and of my place in it, and I write in the hope that my words will resonate with others; that they will read a line over and over and say, This. This is how I feel.’

But this is also a book for anyone who is wishing to support someone who is grieving, or may just come into contact with a bereaved person (almost certainly all of us at some point in our lives!). Of course there is no universal experience of grief and bereavement, and feelings and responses change over time, but Clare’s helpful tips and observations about the things that other people did or said that upset, angered, or set her back are extremely useful to know. It gives us tools and insights to enable us to support, or even just interact with, a person who is grieving in a sensitive and positive way.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Clare Mackintosh is a former police officer and multi-award-winning author. Her books have been Sunday Times and international bestsellers and have sold more than 2 million copies worldwide. Clare has spoken on radio and television about the death of her son, grief and healing. She lives in North Wales with her family.

OTHER BOOKS BY CLARE MACKINTOSH

I Let You Go
I See You
Let Me Lie
After the End
Hostage
The Last Party
A Game of Lies
A Cotswold Family Life (Non-fiction)